Grandchild day care

Relatives regularly care for many U.S. children

By Connie Cartmell, ccartmell@mariettatimes.com
Cuddled up in the cozy recliner reading “Elmo,” stretched out on the play room floor sorting puzzle pieces or taking a walk in the Norwood neighborhood, Bonnie and Michael McGowan are exactly where they want to be with their three grandchildren.

“It’s the very best job in the world,” said Bonnie McGowan with a big smile. “If I didn’t have to work, I’d be here with them all the time.”

Relatives, mostly grandparents, regularly provide child care to almost half of the more than 19 million preschoolers in the United States today, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

A report, “Who’s Minding the Kids? Child Care Arrangements,” published in 2005 showed that among 11.3 million children younger than 5 whose mothers were employed, 30 percent were cared for by a grandparent on a regular basis.

A slightly greater percentage spent time in an organized center or care facility, including a day care, nursery or preschool.

“Grandparents caring for their grandchildren, as a limited child care provider, is a trend nationally,” said Maureen Boggs, early care and education division director, COAD Child Care Resource Network. “It’s hard to find a parent of a young child who has not experienced in-home care for his or her kids by a relative, especially a grandparent.”

The McGowans are the parents of five children, four girls and one boy, and grandparents of five, also four girls and one boy.

Several evenings a week they are principal caregivers to their three local grandchildren, Kaleb Karcher, 21/2, and his 18-month-old twin sisters, Reagan and Taylor.

“It still wears me out,” Michael McGowan said.

The three are the children of Katie and Chad Karcher, also of Marietta.

“I think that I’m a better grandparent than I was a father,” McGowan, 50, said. “I’ve learned what works. You step back and see the bigger picture. You don’t sweat the small stuff.”

McGowan, an avid golfer, has had Kaleb at the local driving range and the boy has a “pretty good” swing already, he said.

“They love anything outside,” McGowan said. “Right now they have cabin fever and are ready to get out.”

He teams with his wife to care for the grandchildren while his daughter works the 3 to 11 p.m. shift at Marietta Memorial Hospital.

For Katie Karcher, 24, the advantages of having her parents with the children are many and valued.

“The kids are in their own environment and get to sleep in their own beds,” she said. “They get more one-on-one care than they would have in any other setting.”

But the biggest plus for family-centered care is trust and security.

“I don’t have to worry,” she said.

Her husband’s parents also take on a large share of child care, especially during the day when Karcher needs to do grocery shopping, run errands or take one child to the doctor.

Debbie Scott and Terry Karcher are there for her, she said.

For the McGowans, there are many advantages to grandchild care.

“With the grandchildren, I still get to go home and go to bed,” Michael McGowan said. “I’m not there 24-7. It isn’t like raising your own kids.”

Both grandparents agree that being with the grandchildren several times a week is “special” time.

“I do the fun,” Bonnie McGowan said.

But there are also some disadvantages for these grandparents. Because the children are so young, they go to their daughter and son-in-law’s home in the afternoon, after their own full-time jobs at Marietta Memorial.

“The toughest part for me is that I’m not at my own house,” Michael McGowan said. “There’s no wind-down time after work.”

The couple prepare dinner, give the grandkids baths and put the little ones in bed for the night. The bulk of the evening they are on their own.

“Once I did take a two-hour nap, but when I got home, I couldn’t sleep the rest of the night,” Michael McGowan said.

An issue is time for themselves, but communication resolves that problem, he said.

“If we do have something going on, we just tell Katie and she makes other arrangements,” McGowan said. “It’s important to be honest and open.”

“She knows that Tuesday is my golf night and we don’t baby-sit Tuesday,” he said.

Parents choose grandparents as child care providers for a wide variety of reasons, but primarily it has to do with trust, Boggs said.

“There are many families that don’t want anybody but family caring for their children,” she said. “The trust issue is the big thing. I think that happens a lot around this area, but I don’t have numbers to support it.”

Financial issues are still another reason that many couples choose family over organized centers, Boggs said.

According to AARP, 20 percent of grandparents are paid for the care they provide. Ordinarily, parents don’t charge their children as much as a day care center would, but the extra income is very important to them, the report said.

Most grandparents, like the McGowans, do not ask to be paid.

More than 50 percent of family providers also work outside the home and child care is an additional responsibility for them, according to AARP.

“A pitfall can be family relationships,” Boggs said. “There is the opportunity for a parent to be taken advantage of.”

Kelly Bauerbach, social service supervisor with Washington County Job and Family Services, said there has been an increase in the numbers of local grandparents who are child caregivers. Although she did not have specific numbers, Bauerbach said a number of grandparents and family members have been certified by the state as Type B providers. This means they can receive payment for their time, if the parents meet income requirements.

Boggs said although there is a movement under way to license all in-home care for young children, this does not include grandparents.