Good intentions don’t guarantee desirable outcomes.

For example, in 1910, three years following her mother’s death, Anna Jarvis began the observance of Mother’s Day in Grafton, WV.

Jarvis planned a special church service and encouraged people to give their mother a white carnation, saying, “Its whiteness is to symbolize the truth, purity and broad-charity of mother love; its fragrance, her memory, and her prayers. The carnation does not drop its petals, but hugs them to its heart as it dies, and so, too, mothers hug their children to their hearts, their mother love never dying. When I selected this flower, I was remembering my mother’s bed of white pinks.” Jarvis believed that mothers everywhere should be honored for the service they render to humanity. She worked tirelessly to make Mother’s Day a national holiday, a feat she achieved in 1914.

But in later years, Jarvis hated what she started because of the commercialization brought to Mother’s Day by the floral, confection and greeting card industries. With no tolerance for those methods of “honoring” mothers, Jarvis wrote, “A printed card means nothing except that you are too lazy to write to the woman who has done more for you than anyone in the world. And candy! You take a box to Mother–and then eat most of it yourself. A pretty sentiment.” Anna Jarvis believed in a simple, heartfelt appreciation for the role that mothers fill in our world. So, with that in mind…

Here’s to the moms who rise early from a warm bed to wake us for school, have clean clothes for us to put on and supper ready when we come home. They endure long hours in stadium seats and praise those first faltering efforts with a musical instrument. We’re thankful for the moms who loved us enough to tan our hides when we deserved it, and who didn’t sleep until they heard our car in the driveway. Thanks, mom, for wearing that old dress so that we could wear new shoes at Easter and for those long Christmas Eves wrapping presents. Even today, you slave away on holidays so that all the family can be together under one roof for dinner. We appreciate those sacrifices; they make us feel loved.

Here’s to the ladies whose bodies didn’t produce children, but whose hearts made a home for the offspring of others. Because you were open to adoption, an unplanned pregnancy didn’t end prematurely. You didn’t let poverty pass itself on to another generation, and helped an “unwanted” child feel love. You pushed for good grades, paid the car insurance for a new driver and helped pick out the wedding dress. In so many ways you helped someone else’s baby know they were actually yours. You didn’t let the vagaries of biology keep you from motherhood. Thank you!

Thanks, too, to the ladies who raised their own kids and then opened their home to others. You let the student stay to finish out their senior year when their family moved away. You took in the foster kids. You guided the single dad trying to raise a teenage daughter. You spent a small fortune on groceries and threw air mattresses on the floor when your kids came from college with a pack of friends. And later, when your children disappointed you, you gave their children a safe place to land. You started over, “mothering” your grandkids. You, too, understand that motherhood isn’t just a biological state.

And let’s not forget the spiritual “moms” among us. We didn’t share their home, but we owned space in their hearts. They changed diapers in the church nursery, taught the third grade Sunday School class for 40 years, and ferried us to the youth convention. They planned Vacation Bible School and made pizza for the youth group and bought little gifts for birthday presents. They were the first to hug us and whisper how proud they were when we were baptized. Some of those ladies are gone now; their bodies rest in the church cemetery and their names are seldom heard. Others have “retired” from teaching, but their prayers still mention those students from yesteryear and support those who teach and serve today.

In those moments when our minds turn back to childhood, we recognize the debt we owe those who helped give birth to our faith.

Anna Jarvis was right; flowers, candy and cards just won’t get the job done. Mothers deserve to be truly honored.