The late Charlie Tremendous Jones said, “You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for two things, the people you meet and the books you read.”

Sunday, in Phoenix at Influence, the National Speakers Association’s annual conference, my wife Lynnda, got randomly selected by presenter Robert Fogarty of Dear World from 900 attendees in the general session, to read her short story. “Dear World” is a collective of innovators, change-makers, development leaders and storytellers dedicated to amplifying voices and fostering connection.

Lynnda was interviewed, then read her story. She was on the jumbo video screens. Lynnda says she is a trainer, not a speaker, working with me in our training sessions for as many as 100 people. She claims to be nervous on stage and even when she reads at our church in front of 50 people.

Under pressure, in front of 900 professional speakers, the largest audience of her life, she nailed it! For the next three days, when meeting someone new we typically heard, “Aren’t you the woman who was on stage Sunday? You were great!”

Charlie Tremendous Jones would probably say her success is no accident. Lynnda reads a lot of books and has attended NSA conferences with me for over 20 years. Initially she got to hang out at the pool and go to the closing dinner. She met a lot of great professional speakers.

When we started our business over 10 years ago, I registered her for the entire conference as a full participant. She saw great speakers perform and met them in person at events. She sat in their teaching sessions with me. Lynnda grew in confidence and skill as a presenter.

Speaking and presenting to a group is not something Lynnda is passionate about like me. She does it to help others, particularly in the area of health and wellness to save lives. It was a thrill for me to see her present so well when the opportunity came!

Lynnda learned what all successful speakers know: It’s all about the audience, not about us or our message. Her desire to make a positive difference in the lives of people was more important than her fears.

The late radio personality and Hall of Fame speaker Earl Nightingale said, “Success is when preparedness meets opportunity and opportunity is there all the time.” Sometimes opportunity is disguised as mistakes, falls or even failure.

Failure is feedback. Ty Bennett, a bestselling author and speaker with a huge ninja course in his back yard said, “the No. 1 barrier to high performance is fear of failure.” His two boys have become national ninja warrior successes after overcoming fear of failure.

Matthew Knowles – a global leader in sales and marketing, brand development, entrepreneurship and leadership who helped market Beyonce, Destiny’s Child and other award-winning performers – said, “Pray for a life not free of trouble, pray for triumph over trouble. What we call adversity, the universe calls opportunity. Failure can be a reason to grow or an excuse to quit.”

Hall of Fame speaker Amanda Gore said, “Two core fears many of us have by age 7 are; I am not worth loving. I am not good enough.”

Lynnda constantly heard from her father she was stupid and wouldn’t amount to anything. Her high school guidance counselor said she was too dumb for college. Lynnda joined the Navy and became a corpsman (medic). She later got her nursing LPN and then her RN. They never saw her the way I do. Those childhood fears and negative beliefs she heard growing up still haunt her, even after 50 years of being encouraged by me and others.

At Influence, there were new speakers starting their businesses, successful six-figure speakers, multimillionaire speakers and business owners. NSA is a mixture of races, ethnicity, ages, religions, backgrounds and national origins, all working together helping each other to make a bigger pie. Political opinions aren’t discussed. NSA is a melting pot of natural diversity working together to create opportunity and raise everyone up in spite of differences.

The NSA model could work in lots of places. At NSA Influence, smiles and laughter are standard.

Influence is our annual shot of positivity. At NSA, I noticed the more successful a person is, the humbler they are and the more generous. ALL have faced and overcome adversity. Many have handicaps they have overcome and turned into opportunity. Successful speakers have a dream and know where they are going. They believe it is possible and are encouraged by others. They do the work and over-prepare. They are people of integrity. They understand trust is essential. Success is available to anyone. EVEN YOU. It is a repeatable process anyone can follow.

How do you look at setbacks, adversity and failure? Successful people see them as part of the ladder of success. Does fear of failure keep you from being a high performer?

Here are some other quotes heard this past week at NSA that may help you. We worry about AI. Erin King said, “Automate the easy so you can elevate the EPIC.”

Hall of Fame Speaker Simon Bailey talked about giving people hope. “Be the plus in a minus world.”

Daniel Burrus said, “The transformational changes in AI are being severely underestimated with the advent of super-intelligent bots. Yes, I believe bots will be making speeches, but they will lack the human connection.” AI can help us assemble facts. AI can’t tell a story that makes the human connection we all need.

To summarize:

¯ Know where you are going.

¯ Believe it is possible.

¯ Have a team of supporters.

¯ Do the work.

¯ Failure isn’t final. Learn from it. Move forward.

¯ Read books. Meet and hang out with positive people.

¯ Be a person of integrity people can trust.

¯ Be humble. Focus on helping others and making a difference.

¯ Give your time, talent and money to help others.

¯ Smile!

Others have succeeded. You can too.

¯¯¯

Greg Kozera, gkozera@shalecrescentusa.com, is the director of marketing for Shale Crescent USA. He is a professional engineer with a master’s in environmental engineering and more than 40 years of experience in the energy industry.

Greg is a leadership expert, high school soccer coach, professional speaker and author of four books and many published articles.